February 4, 1981

[DELETED SESSION]

[FEBRUARY 4, 1981 8:56 PM WEDNESDAY]

(This session may mark the beginning of the most important group of sessions Seth has given so far. Certainly we hope so.)

(It came about because of several factors I'll try to list in at least rough chronological order. The first of these would be Jane's nearly extreme physical changes over the past few months, her ups and downs as far as mobility, feelings, aches, restless sleep, etc., are concerned.

Seth has said again and again that these changes represent improvements growing out of our better understanding of our beliefs, our artistic/creative work, and indeed our whole life-style. We have tried to go along with his pronouncements, but also have felt numerous misgivings, as may be quite natural.)

(Jane's sessions have been very irregular also, and she hasn't worked on Seth's latest book for some months now. Therein lay one of those clues that was right in front of us, yet invisible at the same time. In each Seth book there have been layoffs, so to speak---long or longish eriods in between certain sessions, while, usually, we held personal sessions in the interim; these were usually devoted to trying to get at the root causes of Jane's symptoms. This pattern was most pronounced while Seth was producing) Mass Events [, but without checking at the moment we remember similar if shorter layoffs while the previous books were being produced. This has always bothered me to some extent, but I usually told myself that was Jane's way of working, and to forget it. It did make for some tricky work writing notes for] Mass Events [, say, to explain these long periods in between certain sessions in the book.]

(I didn't fully grasp the significance of these interludes while working on) Mass Events, [not until I reread the other night Jane's paper of December 27, 1980. She'd written that treatise at my request following some remarks she'd made. I'd read it, but it hadn't enetrated sufficiently at the time. In it she tied her eye trouble and other symptoms with her fears about public reactions to her Seth work---her fears of its rejection, etc., and that she might---indeed, has---found herself outside the accepted realms of science, religion, etc., because of her psychic work.]

(As soon as I reread her paper the evening before last, I was reminded of the two excerpts I'd copied from recent deleted sessions---those for January 26 and 28, 1981. In them Seth briefly explained how Jane had created her symptoms as protection against the spontaneous self going too far: this fear was the real reason for the symptoms---not, as we usually thought, her fear that she would do other things besides work if she had normal mobility. The latter idea is a cover-up for the previous one. To Jane, going too far means that she would find herself in an unsafe position in the world. And to me, as I began to put all of this together, it meant that although she did the Seth books, which we think so highly of, she also drags her feet in resistance with each one---hence the long intervals of non-work that crop up during the roduction of each one. Again, without checking, I think that an examination of our records would show that her symptoms flared up, indeed worsened, as she worked on each Seth book, and that behind her labors on each book there lay this fear that she was going too far with each one she produced. This fear may be based on outmoded ideas---as Seth has mentioned at various times---it may make no sense, or whatever, yet as long as it exists it must be dealt with. This present session represents, then, our latest attempt to come to terms with all of our ersonal, public, and creative aspects involved with the Seth material---not just those we'd chosen to deal with in past years.)

(Yesterday morning, then, while painting, the thought came to me clearly: Jane does the Seth books just to please me. I knew at the time that this was likely to be an oversimplification, yet I also knew at once that it contained the key to the puzzle; this rather simple idea helped me assemble all of the information already described in these notes, half of it in ways I cannot consciously describe. But it did lead to the discussion I had with Jane this noon on the 4th), and this session. All at once I had several ideas I wanted to talk over with her.]

(Coupled with all of this is the statement Seth made recently to the effect that we "have made no major errors." This is one of those bits of data that I return to much later and begin to question, after having let it pass at the time. "Well, if we've made no major errors," I said to Jane recently, "what do you call the hassles we do have?"' I was---am---quite aware of the humor implicit in the whole situation. At times I for one can agree with Seth, but at other times I have strong doubts.)

(This noon after lunch, then---on the 4th---Jane and I had a discussion about the ideas mentioned above. My latest efforts to cope with our challenges involve her letting go of Seth's latest books.)

Dreams [, for some time. That is, we can work on it if we want to, but with no thought of deadlines or signing a contract, which would commit Jane to additional public exposure. The idea is that she'll be free to do what she wants with the Seth material, for as long as she wants to, without our adding fuel to her fears until we've had a chance to work things through. I told her I was sure I was on the right track here, without knowing positively that I was, and without having pat answers that would solve all of our hassles.]

(Putting off) Dreams [, it seemed to me, was a necessity at the moment because I now believed that the long interlude in her dictation was, again, a clear sign of resistance to the project on Jane's part. The idea is an attempt to at least call a halt to something that she has resisted from the start, or so it seems in retrospect---and I mean the start of the sessions, not just] Dreams [. I reminded her that I was the one who first suggested we start publishing the Seth material, and that she'd had reservations about doing that. It seemed to me now that a clear course of hanging back had been displayed by Jane all though our psychic endeavors, and that it could be easily charted if we took the time to do so. I said that she would have robably used her psychic gifts in some fashion in her writing, but that the Seth books might very well have not come into existence except for my own interest---hence my mental insight this morning that Jane did the Seth books to please me. I know things aren't that simple, but I do feel that the fact of public exposure represented by the Seth books has always bothered Jane. And currently she has been bothered more than ever, as she has described in her December 27, 1980 paper. This upset includes her work on her own latest,] The God of Jane [.]

(I explained that in their different ways both Jane's ESP classes, and the mail, reflect other aspects of public exposure, and that these too must have engendered resistance over the years. (Jane remarked last week to the effect that she wondered how she could get out of answering the mail, for example.) Class had always seemed to offer much, and has helped many people, yet implicit in its very existence was the fact of ublic exposure concerning unacceptable psychic abilities, in Jane's eyes, I told her. My idea is that both class and mail have had an unfortunate reinforcing effect over the years as far as the symptoms and their attendant fears go.]

(Like class, Jane has often been threatened by the mail, only more overtly, as well as by personal visitors who sought us out. Another example of this occurred at noon, when we were visited by two beautiful young ladies---who, unfortunately, were using the Seth material in ways we wouldn't have. All such incidents, I told Jane, reinforce individual actions on the part of readers that would be quite rejected by the establishment: further signs of how far outside accepted thought Jane has found herself over the years. I explained here that I thought this has always bothered her deeply. No reviews in accepted journals, no welcome in the universities by academia, as she herself wrote in) God of Jane [. And of course the whole lengthy disclaimer bit for] Mass Events [beautifully sums up the situations: Even our own publisher seeks to protect itself from possible legal action because of the material within the Seth books. Jane sees this as a threat, although she doesn't say much about it. And I for one wonder about disclaimers for future books---or even having them added to past works.]

(Even today's mail, which we read after finishing our discussion, contained several beautiful examples of points I've described above.

This brought up another matter---our being confronted with the work we have published, as well as by) Mass Events and God of Jane [. No way to get away from those fifteen books of the past, I said, so to that extent we have to live with the results they engender.

I too wondered about dispensing with answering the mail, while being very reluctant to do so, since many of the letters are openly laudatory, and we save them for reference [although we haven't actually used any for such purposes]. But therein lies trouble, too, I said, because they would reflect Jane's concern about public exposure, her fears about leading people astray.]

(Putting off the publication of) Dreams [, then, is only a loy to gain some time to defuse the present situation, while Jane's body struggles to right itself as much as possible. We do believe Seth's assessment, to the effect that her body is righting itself in numerous areas after years of disuse, of being held down, but at the same time it's very difficult not to have qualms and doubts about what's happening at the same time. At Christmastime I discussed with Jane the idea of seeking medical help, and asked her to tell me what she thought of this idea later, but she has yet to bring up the subject. I knew she's not in favor of it, but as I said at the time, this seemed to mean that she was indulging the idea of spending the balance of her life sitting down ---quite immobile for all practical purposes. I'd told her at the time that I had no great hope that medicine could help much, but still I wondered often enough if the medical profession might be able to offer some sort of help. I didn't want Jane to get so bad that she was forced to turn to doctors, before at least considering outside help. At times I feared something like this would happen if she wasn't able to "pull out"

of her symptoms on her own---that is, with her own, Seth's, and my help.]

(I repeated in our discussion that it was perfectly all right with me if Jane chose not to publish any more Seth books, but concentrated on her own works, and she said she understood this. It's my personal opinion, at least of the moment, that it will be quite a while before) Dreams [is either finished or printed. At least Jane now has some breathing space, and the cycle of resistance may be interrupted, say, if not reversed yet. We now have time for Framework 2 to operate. In this interim I may do some work on] Dreams [myself, or start something of my own.]

(I also learned during the discussion that Jane didn't like the Seth book material being tied too closely to current events, as witness) Mass Events [and Jonestown and Three Mile Island. She reminded me also that even the title of] Mass Events [, when Seth had given it, had alarmed her, or at least aroused some sort of defensive mechanism in her---something I'd forgotten. On the other hand, I'd taken it for granted that the way Seth had used current events in] Mass Events [had been quite natural and extremely informative, offering a much broader view of human affairs. This little dilemma also pointed up some of Jane's other reactions to remarks I would make, innocently enough, I thought, to the effect that Seth could do a great book on any number of current events---the latest being the whole hostage question. She hadn't really been in favor of such endeavors, then, even when she discussed them with me.]

(Nor, I might add, had I ever pressed her to do books with Seth on current events. It's clear now that she would see such efforts as leaving her too open to public attack. The same goes for appearances on TV---as note our recent involvement with the ABC news offer---and, robably, on radio. In short, then, it seems that any overtures she may choose to make about encountering public reaction to her abilities will ---and should be---of her own choosing. Perhaps if she attains a sense of inner peace and protection she will come to naturally make such choices; doing which will encourage her feeling of personal freedom and safety instead of threatening it.)

(Perhaps our biggest challenge from now on will be how to deal with the "fallout" from work we've already done---those 17 books out there that are constantly drawing a very mixed group of reactions from people "across the board." Not all of this is bad, of course, and I trust that here again Jane will gradually come to an accommodation with such responses, seeing them not as implied threats, but as true reinforcements of her abilities, which, as we have learned, really do have the power to move others in a variety, and often profound number of ways.)

(I've taken the time to write the above notes as much as for a reminder to myself as for anything else, and to start off this session as something special. I did not know whether Jane would have a session or not---yet I was still somewhat surprised when she did offer to hold one tonight. Once again, she'd been "so far out of it," sitting on the couch and watching TV, that I'd given up on hearing Seth comment upon our latest ideas. Jane had been "out of it" for most of the day, except during our talk, which lasted over an hour. I must admit that at this time I'm pretty well puzzled as how to best help her. She was still very uncomfortable each day as bodily changes swept through her. Her backside and legs in particular have bothered her recently. Yet last night it had been her arms and elbows---I'd say that during the night she'd wake me up over a dozen times crying in her sleep at the discomfort in her arms.

This morning I discovered that the knots of muscle beneath her left elbow had almost disappeared---an effect I'd never seen before. Instead the elbow was full of fluid. Was this the latest attempt by the body to heal itself by flooding afflicted areas with soothing liquid, say as lubrication, or what?)

(As I covered her up for a nap at 4:30 this afternoon, I asked her "how one person could raise so much hell?"---meaning that in line with our talk today I now believed that the whole Seth business, and especially the books, had been conducted in the face of a steady, fierce resistance. One foot dragging the other after it, was a way I'd put it recently. That resistance is the state that we absolutely must dissipate, I think.)

(By 8:52, then, Jane said she felt Seth around. She'd perked up a little, although she was still quite bleary-eyed. At the same time she sat quite upright in her chair, not leaning back, and I read this osture as a sign that she was still very uncomfortable sitting there.

She began the session at her usual pace of delivery, but after a few aragraphs slowed down considerably.)

Now--- (Good evening.)

---I will end up covering all of the areas you discussed this afternoon ---of course, in my own fashion. We will call this discussion one.

There is some difference, of course, in Ruburt's mind between his attitude toward his books and mine. To some extent this is more than understandable. He would (pause) , had I not emerged, written books of his own in any case. He would have encountered no unusual obstacles as far as his public stance was concerned, in that he would have felt the rather characteristic dilemma of some creative writers, who must assimilate the private and public ortions of their experiences. He would have had no unusual difficulty, however, in say, standing up for his own ideas---holding his own, so to speak, in any arguments or philosophies.

He would have been in that case operating himself within the recognizable framework of psychological identity, being himself within the context of personality structure as it would be defined by all. He feels quite competent with his own books. They begin by giving some verbal tribute to old definitions, and then [take off from there) , having firmly established the fact that he is more or less in the same kettle of fish. In that regard there is little ambiguity.

Now, my books do not pretend to even accept those conventions, but start out from a different viewpoint entirely. That viewpoint alone makes a difference. That viewpoint alone establishes a different kind of pattern. It assumes to know. It speaks of knowledge that is self-evident from my point of view. It offers no apologies for itself. It presupposes a vaster structure of personality and identity, eriod.

(Now slowly at 9:13:) Ruburt is very highly gifted---extraordinarily so in many respects. The nature of his gift generally speaking, however, presupposes or implies the existence of vast reaches in the psyche---reaches that if (pause) unwisely compared to the usual portions of the self, can seem to leave the usual self in a position of inferiority by contrast.

(] (After breakfast on the morning of the 5th I read this session to Jane before typing it in the afternoon. Seth's statement stopped me in what seemed to be a new way personally---for I don't think I've considered that Jane might even see Seth's own material as in competition---or as even a threat, although I don't care for that word ---to her. This whether the material was published or not. Yet Jane said she'd had such thoughts occasionally. I don't recall her telling me about them, though.)

The books that I have written are excellent conveyors, not only of content but of essence. In a fashion, as far as the psyche is concerned, they come from a portion that is indeed immersed in knowledge that is self-evident.

If I were only--- only ---a portion of Ruburt's larger syche, then I would be the portion that knows what it knows: the ortion that is concerned with spontaneous knowledge.

Now. Your social systems have very few frameworks that even take such experiences into consideration. (Pause.) There are the esoteric schools, for example, the spiritualistic societies, the Eastern traditions. Overall they involve a very small esoteric group. The mainspring of society becomes touched by such groups now and then---but in the world of, say, the usual public encounter there are no accepted frameworks for such experiences.

You have first of all to explain your definition of personality, to attempt redefinitions of a very emotional kind, for when you are speaking of, say, space and time, that is one thing. When you are asking eople to reexamine the whole matter of personal identity, you are setting conditions that may frighten many of them. Ruburt feels that he could, for example, explain any of his own books from his own framework quite well. To explain my books is something else again, and in that manner of speaking, my books are self-evident also.

(Long pause at 9:27.) Give us a moment.... There are few people in such a position. He is not cowardly in that regard (as Jane had speculated during our discussion) ). He was, in fact, quite daring in refusing to accept the conventional spirit-guide dogma---which would at least have given him a kind of sychological covering (all emphatically) .

(Pause.) He is appalled with the way that many people interpret my material. Sometimes it seems he would prefer even a smaller but more select group of readers (with amusement) ---readers who were tops in their fields, or who in one fashion or another earned his respect. The point is that our books reach [all kinds)

of readers in all walks of life. That is because all kinds of people are innately acquainted with the nature of self-evident knowledge.

They may misinterpret its nature, project it outside of themselves, turn it into a hobby, a chore, a religion, an art, a rigorous set of laws---but reading my books, they recognize the authority of the inner syche.

Ruburt and you live in a world with its own cultural taboos, its own assumptions. The idea of personhood is a highly vital one, uniting eoples and societies. The idea of personhood held by the Roman Catholic Church affected the history of the world for centuries, and that idea of personhood is intimately involved, of course, with the idea of personhood's source.

Now Ruburt understood quite well in a fashion that his own experiences were taking him outside of that cohesive framework, not simply outside of science's or religion's dictums, but outside of those areas that science and religion ignored, deplored, or denied (all very intently) .

(9:40.) In that regard he felt that he was violating an important cultural taboo, and embarked upon a program that would necessitate caution, self-protection, and a certain detachment. He was determined to go ahead, because his own value fulfillment sought those directions---such was his nature. My published works, however, presented him with what he felt to be a public stance in a different fashion than his own would (louder) . My books automatically seemed to suggest a framework of reference to which [few others] could have access.

(Jane was speaking very intently for Seth through this material. The night was very cold; a bitter wind struck at the house again and again, rattling the blinds in the heavy metal awnings on the western side of the living room where we sat.)

Again, definitions of personality are important here. Ruburt could read oetry without first having to define the nature of a poet. He could meet any criticisms with suitable explanations, since any audience was not about to question the poet's psychological validity. Any arguments would take place within an implied framework of definitions.

Before even hearing the poetry no such audience, Ruburt felt, would question the fact of poetry itself---its techniques, traditions or value. My books, however, by their very existence appear in a world that largely does not concern itself with anything but the most surface elements of psychological reality. (Long pause.) The matter of duplicity almost immediately arises. Ruburt feels the existence of innumerable barriers in that regard---having, he feels, to fend with the questions that ensue.

(Pause.) I must be, as Seth, true or false, fiction or nonfiction, personality essence---spirit, if you prefer---or Ruburt's own psyche in definitions usually accepted, playing at best a dubious role. And to a large degree those questions would be there even if our material quite agreed with the established knowledge of your world--- [but it does not] . It contradicts much of the world's knowledge.

If Ruburt wants to disagree with the world's knowledge, he feels that it is his right---and again, would defend such ideas forthrightly. They would be based upon experiences that are his own---many that you have shared as a result of your own personal experiences together. But Ruburt is not aware of my subjective experience. My self-evident knowledge comes even if I were no more, again, than a part of his larger psyche, from reaches that would be inaccessible in those terms to him (all emphatically) . That is, in those terms I would be delivering self-evident knowledge to him, revealing it (long ause) , delivering it. I could not hand over the sychological quality of self-evident knowing , however.

[In that regard] he does not have the same kind of inner experience with which to back up my words.

To some extent he lacks the kind of faith in people that I have, because of the belief systems that surround you. It bothers him that some eople, he thinks, consider that our books make up another bible or its equivalent, and it seems to him that their lack of understanding in that regard hampers his own creativity.

His attitude can hamper his creativity. Theirs, of course, cannot.

The success of the books brings such questions into prominence, of course, and I will discuss more of those allied concerns.

Give us a moment.... the books themselves---mine as well as his---are themselves indications of achievements (pause) that are not easily broken off, since they represent the natural, creative development of his own abilities and growth. They also provide, if you realize it, the solutions to your dilemmas, as I hope you shall shortly see. That is, they provide you with that larger framework of understanding, for the old frameworks of understanding force you to continue to explore your reality for larger definitions. In those areas of concern, then, Ruburt is still involved with too-small definitions.

I will have far more to say, but that is enough for discussion one. I know that it is difficult to understand, but the challenge is one of growth, one that exists in a fashion because you have moved into an ever-expanding framework ---but in an uneven course.

In larger fashions you have made no grievous errors. That will become clear as we proceed with this discussion. End of session--- ("Thank you, Seth." I said when that worthy paused.)

A fond good evening. This should help relieve some of Ruburt's stress.

Read the session of course together. I will also give some pertinent comments more specifically, involving interviews, television, classes and so forth.

("Thank you.")

(10:15 PM. Jane came out of trance very heavy-lidded. Then: "I guess it's me ---but write this down, if I can get it quickly enough---about creativity and dogma. I think it's in relation to my book dictation.")

[(I told her the session was excellent, as I'd known it would be. "Yes."

she said. "I had the feeling that he was going to get into deeper stuff." All through the session she'd sat stiffly upright in her chair; hardly relaxed. I urged her now to get back on the couch. "I wish I'd done the dishes," she said. There was a day's accumulation of them in the sink. The bitter wind banged the metal awnings outside; the local forecast was for a temperature of zero degrees to five/ten below. I told Jane I'd do the dishes---and read the session to her from my notes tomorrow morning after breakfast.]

(Now it's Friday night the 6th) as I finish typing this session.

Seth's reference to "grievous errors" was obviously in answer to my own comment as recorded in the opening notes. At first when I asked her, Jane said the session hadn't done anything to "relieve some of Ruburt's stress." But then we decided that it had helped her somewhat Thursday and Friday. On Wednesday night she'd had a dream involving our Instream-Oswego experience, and a copy of that is attached under February 5. And she had a pair of positive healing dreams that afternoon during her customary nap. These dreams were quite good.]

(Jane's dream about Oswego reminded me of a little episode that I think of every so often, and that I've referred to in a note in one of the books, I think---probably) Mass Events [: When I'd asked her once years ago what she wanted to do more than anything else in life, she'd answered quickly, "Change the world." Her conflict can be easily seen, then, manifesting between that idea and her deep-seated need for rotection.]

(These notes at the end of the session are meant to round out the opening notes, and to suggest new questions for us and for Seth. The other day I'd told Jane that I had given up on the idea of donating our work and assets to Yale University Library ---indeed, that in the year since we'd had our will made out I hadn't sent them any material at all.

Jane agreed that the idea of Yale had made her uneasy. I hadn't even answered Larry Dowler's long letter of acceptance beyond sending him a short note of thanks for all his work. Jane, now, did not urge that we contribute to Yale. Our will still commits us in case of accident, say, but that document can be changed.)

(After this session was held we briefly talked about things we might do in order to ensure privacy, should we decide to be more active in the ursuit of that quality. There would be moving to a new location, erhaps, or doing something about the mail---answering labors each week.

I suppose we might use the post office's impending rate increases as an excuse to save on postage, and either cut way down on, or eliminate, answering the mail, if this will help. I'm willing to do most anything, but our ideas here as yet are very vague, and I haven't discussed with Jane yet whether she thinks a move would do any good, really.)

(That topic ties in with my idea that I mentioned to her this afternoon, about it hardly being a coincidence that many events in our lives are coming to a head at the same time: Our deep upset about Jane's condition; the trouble with the disclaimer idea for) Mass Events [; Prentice-Hall's reorganization into the General Publishing Division, in which all of their narrative books will be phased out, thus eliminating any real need for Tam and his job; indeed, Tam is looking at other job offers even now. [It's been my position for some time now that Tam will end up leaving Prentice-Hall, or will be let go.] If and when he does go, we will be without our friend there, and will have to make decisions based on that departure. But we may be in the process of making such decisions even now, I suspect. I doubt if we would follow Tam helter-skelter to another publishing house if he left Prentice-Hall tomorrow---especially in light of our decision to hold off on]

Dreams [. And the irony of the situation is that, even though we detest the idea of the disclaimer for] Mass Events [, we see it as another means of protection in the public arena....]

[(We are making small decisions about protection along the way, however.

Today I mailed Jane's letter to Meredith Wheeler of ABC News, declining MW's second recent invitation to be on that show; and when Tam called this afternoon to tell Jane that a British journalist was at CBS in NYC, and wanted to interview her for a newspaper article, we decided to not call back and okay the interview.]

(Today I also reminded Jane about a question we've thought about at other times: Why does the portion of her that's raising such a fuss about protection not understand the damage it's doing to the whole ersonality---including itself? The circle becomes self-defeating, of course, and as far as I'm concerned reached that status years ago. Yet it persists.... Any hope we have in all of this is that our new stance will allow us to focus on the good things we have in life, and to create a synthesis of old and new ideas that will result in Jane returning to normal mobility. In this session Seth referred to Jane's need for value fulfillment as she explored her psychic gifts. He also stated that our old frameworks of understanding force us to continue to explore reality for larger definitions. All very well, if such explorations can be carried out with a reasonable feeling of safety or protection, evidently, but if that essential ingredient or feeling is missing, then more caution must be used by us---and as I see it, that's where we stand now. The hope is that our hiatus as far as encountering the public goes will give us some valuable time to organize new approaches to our lives.)

(I remarked to Jane today that if I'd known what I think I know now, today, a month ago we could have withdrawn) Mass Events [from Prentice-Hall, using the disclaimer dispute as an excuse, and delayed its publication for as long as we wanted to. I added that although we'd talked about doing so---and had even mentioned doing so in our letter to the legal department last December---I'd also felt that she wouldn't stand for such an action. Now, it seems that we will have to deal with the public as far as] Mass Events [goes. All of these kinds of reasons apply to] God of Jane [also, as far as I can tell, though probably to a lesser degree.]

(I doubt if finances are a problem, incidentally, as I explained to Jane. We have two books coming out this year; when they earn back their advances there will be income from them. Many of Jane's other books also roduce a yearly royalty income in the meantime. She may do other books than on matters psychic, and these will earn money also. If our income dropped because we committed ourselves to no new books, the royalty and the interest on our savings would be much more than adequate to live on, for then state and federal taxes would melt away. Financially, then, now is an ideal time to experiment with any changes we may want to put into effect. Jane's poetry book is due in 1981; she's started a ")

Seven [."]

(As for myself, I have more than enough to do to keep me busy indefinitely. Helping Jane, taking care of the house, typing sessions, working on taxes and other correspondence, filing, painting---these things and many others are more than enough to keep me going indefinitely. And since I will not be doing the formal notes for another Seth book for some time, it now seems impossible that I managed to find as much time as I did to work on the previous books.)

[(So. we'll take it from here....)

[JANE'S NOTES]

[FEB. 5, 1981]

(We had a Seth session for me last PM. Early this morning I awakened, quite sore, and with the vague memory of a dream. It involved a cold unwelcoming room which represented I think the reception of my work or writing. There were things I could do to rectify this though; and in the dream I did this, and awakened....a card table was involved somehow.)

(Seth's session may have been in my mind. Anyhow I got the following thoughts at once: that when we were in Oswego so many years ago visiting Instream at the university I discovered that.... my experiences put me outside the pale; on the other side of the fence from, say, the academic circles that I'd so respected; that my experience with other people was going to be vastly different; I thought I was looking for truth, but I'd be one of those under suspicion because of the kind of person into which I'd developed.... This meant.... I'd need protection, some distance from the world.... I'd thought such things before but this was full of emotion.... (Also see healing dream later in the day).... I began to doubt myself, feeling that my natural leanings would lead me into areas considered suspect by others; that instead of rewards, there would be tinges at least of dishonor. (The rewards)

[are ] [considerable though, I admit.)

[COPY OF INSPIRATIONAL TYPE MATERIAL RECEIVED SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 6]

[AFTER READING PORTIONS OF MY 1973 NOTEBOOK]

[Seth as a "master event." As the Mona Lisa is "more real" than, say, a normal object or the canvas that composes it, so is all good or great art more than its own physical manifestation. Consider art as a natural henomena constructed by the psyche, a trans-species of perception and consciousness that changes, enlarges and expands life's experiences and casts them in a different light, offering new opportunities for creating action and new solutions to problems by inserting new, original data.]

[To confine such creativity to solve life's problems]

[primarily ] [or to direct it primarily in that fashion, limits it and holds it in an improper focus; shackles it.]

[So after getting to the position that yes, these ideas]

[are ] [factual (or even, larger than facts) is okay, good---but only part of the picture, and the premise could actually be misleading and limiting....]

[We have to go beyond that---the point of problem-solving or roblem-focus ---back to stressing the creative larger-than-life aspects, otherwise all we have is a better problem-solving framework.

Nothing wrong with that of course but we're still in the same arena only our explanations are better than official ones.]

[I've rejected all that kind of hash projected onto Seth's books by others or myself---the assumptions that Seth must prove himself as a roblem solver--- or the importance of functionalism over art.]

[The larger view is that art by being itself, is bigger than life, while springing from it; that Seth and my books go beyond that simply by being themselves. They automatically put people in a different vaster sychological space, another frame of reference, in which a good number of problems vanish or simply do not apply....]

(To do that, I have to drop those old feelings of responsibility as a rimary focus (to get the ideas out quickly so they can help people, etc.) because those feelings strain the Seth-book framework particularly when I demand that in each book Seth answers all questions and so forth.]

[Again as with master events, we're dealing with a different framework of action entirely, where the Mona Lisa is "more real" than the physical roperties that compose it, which is not to deny the validity of the canvas, say. But to discuss Seth or Seth's ideas primarily from the true-or-false framework is the same thing as considering the Mona Lisa only from the validity of the physical properties of paint and canvas; very, very limiting. To "just" say that Seth's ideas are true is to limit him and us....]

[For Seth to comment on our world is okay, but for me to somehow insist that his material offer solutions to all of men's problems is not--- instead it limits the sessions creative thrust. The Seth material is supposed to put us in a different psychic position where the problems are solved automatically or are at least diminished or do not apply....

Only not concentrating on the problems brings in the needed extra material to solve them.]

[The mechanics of publishing have to come last. I've felt that I should "push" the material, go on television or whatever to demonstrate and romote it, but that is the "wrong" level for me.... The strong ideas of responsibility are limiting too; they put you in a less creative framework, stifle creativity. I've hampered my own psychic development and possible new books by such focuses which generate their own aranoiac-like fears.]

[My "work" is not adjacent to the world or parallel exactly but at a different level.... and speaking engagements, etc., would limit it to specifically to human problems.... I don't have to "live up" to anything, I don't have to "make the material work" or prove through my actions that it does because it proves itself in the way that creativity does, by being beyond levels of true-false references. Otherwise, I'm at cross purposes with myself.]